Russian Doll Attempt Leads to Short Exchange and Even Shorter Shrift

I never cease to be amazed at the idiocy of the so-called master race. Humans I mean. Whilst not strictly a rodent, the racoon must at least merit honorary rodent status and this little Russian Racoon should be getting the highest accolade in the quadruped Hall of Fame. So a big high five to the little gnasher for forshortening the career of this slavic wierdo. Neither beer or vodka goggles can excuse this level of stupidity. Now we all know about the traditional Russian Doll but at least they're a)the same species b)the same sex c) sober and d) most importantly smaller than the one they're trying to get into.

On the plus side if he wants to repeat the experiment he'l have to go in feet first next time.

(Link)

Sanity At Last

Just when you think that the whole world has gone stark staring batshit crazy along come a story to restore your faith in the intrinsic sanity of the human race. Check this out, line two is the pertinent entry if you'll pardon the phrase.

Thinks: there may be horses at this party, I'll bring my 5' inflatable penis just in case. You can't be too careful.

Penis Injury Shock Horror...

A report on the Reuters Health Information site highlights a terrifying new trend in toilet seat dynamics, the Heavy Toilet Seat. These socially irresponsible seats are reportedly causing a rise in penile crush injuries in young boys who fail to stay out of the way as the heavy seat descends and lands on their tender little todgers. This 'report' has arisen because a team of doctors from the Leighton Hospital in Crewe have reported four such injuries in the past several months, an effective doubling of this devastating event.
Now forgive me for rising to the bait but one just can't help it really which I suppose is the whole point. There are several issues evident here.
1.Perhaps evolution has just decided that those too stupid, even at such a young age, to move out of the way should have the instrument of their genetic perpetuation curtailed as it were.
2. Perhaps the residents of the Crewe area are producing toddlers so monstrously well endowed that toilet seat manufacturers will have to develop a special Crewe bog seat to allow for their enormous endowments.
3. Or maybe, just maybe the youngsters of the Crewe area have thought to themselves, in an idle moment, 'I wonder what would happen if I just put that there and....
Whatever is the reason for this quasi-epidemic it certainly gave me a laugh.